Magic Mustang Tamer

Getting Personal Help

From a grumpy old lady

I help animals. It is what I do. You might want me to help you, but I am not going to do it. I am going to help your animal. Your animal doesn’t suck as an animal, but you… well, some self-examination of your training skills is in order.

You probably stink and behave in creepy ways from your animal’s point of view. They don’t like perfumes, sunblock, hand lotions, or even essential oils (except for a minimal trace of rosemary or lavender). You drag your feet, walk erratically, gesticulate with your hands, screech at them like a monkey, and threaten them by showing your teeth. You have flappy things wrapped around your body that crinkle and pop when the wind blows. You are oblivious to how much the animal would like to avoid you. You just show your teeth and make cooing baby-talk. You can’t even smell yourself.

You want my help, but you can’t bother to use the plan I give you. You gotta do it your way which is to not have a plan at all, just wing it every time you interact with your animals. I ask how the animal did on Task 2, and you don’t even know Task 2 exists. You haven’t really looked at the YouTube channel where we have hundreds of videos showing every task. I don’t know how to help such a helpless person. The problem is not the animal.

You want my help with your training problem, but you haven’t downloaded the FREE training record book where it spells out, on the back page in big font almost EVERY error you are making. The first thing I am going to tell you is after you check your creepiness level, take a video of yourself trying to train. Then go through the checklist of Top 15 Training Errors. Get real honest with yourself and then address the issues. You are the only one that can fix it.

Now if you still have a residual problem, we should talk about it. I want to help your animal. If you aren’t joining the Thursday night chats to get help, it is a sign that what you really want is narcissistic attention. I don’t have a lot of that to give away to you. I am here to help your animal, but my only means is you. Don’t be the problem.

Which are you doing?

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